The Not Good Enough Story
"Your pain is the breaking of the shell that encloses your understanding."
William grew up in the 70's in America and although he never wanted for much his parents weren't what you'd call well off. In fact William's father worked hard as a factory foreman taking every opportunity to work any extra hours so that he could tuck away some cash for his children's education.
He saw that the managers above him had all been to college and as he got older they just seemed to get younger and younger. It grated with him and as the anger grew within him he set his mind to make sure that his children would rise above his status in life.
He pushed William and his younger sister Kate as hard as he could never wanting them to be satisfied with the life that he led. With the best of good intentions he wished them to be better than him. When they did well at sport he urged them to go that extra step. When they came in the top few students at school he berated them for not being the best student. He did his best to make sure that William was tough. He reasoned that to succeed in life a man had to be able to ride the knocks and bumps and be able to bounce back up never taking time to wallow in self pity or deep emotions.
As time passed William did go off to College and although his Dad was so very proud of him he resisted the urge to tell him, fearing that William would be satisfied with where he had got to rather than continue along the path to success.
Graduating top in his year William's life seemed to be on the fast track but then he met Susan and fell deeply in love. Suddenly William was happy just to be where he was. The desire to please his Father that had driven him onwards faded into the background and although William and Susan were happy and had three children of their own, financial success eluded them.
Soon, the new generation reached high school and within the first few weeks of term William's oldest son Joshua was suspended from school for bad behaviour.
William was furious and that night he let Joshua know it. Joshua's failure pressed a button within him that unleashed his repressed anger and as if in a dream he heard himself telling Joshua that he had let him down and that what he had done was not good enough.
As he spoke the words memories flooded back to him of his Father saying exactly the same thing to him. Realisation floated into his consciousness that he had spent most of his life trying to please his Father and gain recognition and acceptance. Suddenly all was put into perspective - the message that had been tattooed into his brain was 'Nothing you do is good enough'.
He searched back through the past and saw how that message had acted as a virus in his life. How it had blocked the flow of abundance to him. No matter what he did he felt that his efforts had been not good enough and so he felt he did not deserve to receive the rewards of abundance.
The very thing that his Father had sought to achieve had been pushed away by the deeply ingrained message of 'You're not good enough'.
As if struck by lightning William was silenced.
He looked upon his young son anew. He saw how his son was devastated by what he had done. How disappointed he was with himself.
He reached forwards and drew his son to him.
"Joshua, my beautiful son, I love you and believe in you with all of my heart. No matter what you do I will always love you unconditionally. Please forgive me for my anger and lets you and I work out what it is that you want and how we can work on creating that future together."
Be careful what message you pass on to your kids and know that everything is perfect right now.