Creating A Circle Of Honour
“If you fail to honour yourself you can be sure that you will fail to truly honour others”
I hope you are thoroughly enjoying the 30 day ‘No Complaining’ challenge…
I don’t know about you but I really hoped that it would be an easy 30 days where everything would go just swimmingly and I’d just roll along having nothing really to complain about. And that would have been just about when a mini cyclone decided to hit the coast just south of here dumping about 100 mm of rain on us and subsequently flooding the back part of the house.
Damn! Oh yes that’s right NO COMPLAINING…
So, I took a deep breath and started cleaning up all the fine silty mud that had washed into every tiny little crevice it could find.
‘Everything happens for a reason’ – well of course it does and naturally there has to be something GOOD about this situation hasn’t there? Err… The house is cleaner than it was before? I got to throw out some things I should have thrown out ages ago? Umm…
Anyway, please don’t think I’m complaining about not complaining or complaining about not being able to see the bright side of the situation.
Did it matter why? Not really. Did it help to get upset about it? Not really.
Just life and maybe the opportunity to share part of life with my gorgeous daughter who helped clean up in between walking little muddy footsteps through the other part of the house…
Which brings me to honour.
If we start from the premise that we are all linked together in a quantum energy field and that everything I do affects you in some way and everything you do affects me then what drops out of that is the question – ‘What’s really me? Or What’s mine?’
Think about it this way – we are all floating in a swimming pool and each of us has a bubble around us which is ‘our space’. Everyone’s bubble is energetically linked to the fluid in the pool and is both influenced by the fluid and able to influence it.
The way we influence the fluid is through our intention and the way we hold our intention in a certain vibration or feeling is through the use of will.
Now we know from various experiments that have been done that we have the power to influence others by the power of intent. We also know that in a group of people the one with the dominant intent holds sway – that is others will slowly align themselves to the intent of the dominant person in the group. So power then is the ability to pro-actively set and hold intent and not be re-active to others. Hence the notion of ‘holding space’.
In our swimming pool and bubble scenario ‘holding space’ is therefore about setting and holding the intent for our own bubble and the area immediately surrounding our bubble. Knowing that whatever you put out into the pool is going to be drawn to you.
In a ‘real world’ sense then it becomes critical to be able to define what you want inside your bubble – or space – and what’s NOT in your space.
This relates to the first principle in the Self Mastery Program – that of ‘Belief in Yourself’. Specifically – what do you believe you deserve from life?
You see – if you don’t believe you DESERVE to get something then you won’t get it. You will push it away from yourself at every opportunity. Maybe not consciously – but subconsciously and unconsciously. For instance, you might SAY you want to have a happy loving relationship and LOTS of money but if you don’t believe you DESERVE it you won’t get it or you may get a brief glimpse of it before you lose it.
So, being able to honour yourself is key.
Do you love yourself unconditionally regardless of how you behave? So, if you do something bad, dumb, stupid or thoughtless during the day do you go to bed at night having forgiven yourself or do you lie at bed thinking ‘You useless bugger, why did you do that?’ beating yourself up until you finally fall asleep?
Have you released yourself from your past ‘failings’? Or do you have a story based on a whole lot of stuff that happened ages ago, that you can’t change now BUT you keep telling the story and feeding that energy anyway?
Honour – respect highly, confer dignity upon, acknowledge.
Do you honour yourself?
You will fail to honour others if you don’t honour yourself first because the most precious gift you can give another is truth.
Take some time to do the ‘Circle of Honour’ exercise
Go to the beach, the park or the bush – or if you can’t do that simply get a large bit of paper.
Take a few moments to centre yourself by doing some breathing exercises and bringing yourself into the present moment. Set your intention to create your Circle of Honour – your sacred space in the world.
Now slowly and deliberately draw a circle big enough to easily sit in.
When you have finished step into the circle and sit in the middle. Say out loud ‘This is my circle of honour’ and become aware of the size of the circle and the area enclosed by the circle. Take a few moments to centre yourself with your breath.
When you are ready – ask yourself – ‘What type of behaviour is outside my circle?’
This may include: - other people yelling at you, criticising you, complaining to you, abusing you in any way, making sexist or racist remarks, trying to coerce you into doing things you don’t want to do etc.
Take a smaller piece of paper and draw a circle on it. Write all of these things down outside the circle.
Now ask yourself ‘What type of behaviour is inside my circle?’
This may include:- other people listen to my point of view, give me compliments and praise for the work I do, are considerate of my feelings etc.
Write all of these down inside the circle around its edge.
Now look over both of the lists and consider if this is the way you want others to behave towards you:–
‘Who do you need to be for this to happen?’
This may include: - I stand up for myself and speak my truth gently and compassionately at all times. I take the time to praise other people for the good things they do. I resist the urge to criticise others etc
Now write these things down in the middle of the circle.
Look at your final result. Feel what it is like to sit within your Circle of Honour.
Set your intention to take this into the World.
This may seem like a simple exercise but the effects of it are very powerful. Being clear about what is inside your circle and what that means for how you need to be is a great way to set boundaries and to define your ‘space’ in the world.
Honour yourself. Honour others. Change the World.
Also – just to let you know:-
- I’m now offering 1 hour Skype Self Mastery sessions to support people who are going through the Online Self Mastery Program. In the past I have only worked with people going through the 8 month Mentored Self Mastery Program but I see from the requests that I need to be more flexible. So as long as you have Skype installed you can access this service by clicking the ‘Book a Skype Session’ on the homepage at www.acping.net
- I’ve also shifted the Guided Vision Quest Program to an online format. It is now possible to do the Vision Quest over four weeks with 4 one hour Skype Sessions and detailed exercise and practices to follow. More information will be posted on the website soon.
- You might have noticed too that it is now possible to post comments on these Blogs so please feel free to post your feedback.