Are You Up For A Challenge?
“This is the true joy in life. The being used for a purpose, recognised by yourself as a mighty one; the being thoroughly worn out before you are thrown on the scrap heap; the being a force of nature instead of a feverish little clod of ailments and grievances complaining that the world will not devote itself to making you happy.”
George Bernard Shaw
I don’t know about you but I’m with George Bernard Shaw. On my death bed I want to feel thoroughly exhausted sure that I took every opportunity presented to me and engaged with life to the fullest, striving to suck the juice out of every moment of every day.
I’d hate to look back on my life and think ‘Oh if only… if only… if only’
But sadly, if I ask the question now: - ‘Have I engaged with life to the fullest extent possible?’ the answer would be no.
Many times throughout my life I’ve held back through fear. Many times throughout my life I’ve lived for something yet to come. Many times throughout my life I’ve struggled through the hard times waiting, waiting, waiting… For what?
Regardless of what I do now I can’t go back and change the past. But I can change the way I feel about it and I can CHOOSE to re-create my future every single day in every single moment.
Fundamental to all this is how I view the World. Is it a supportive place or an obstructive place? And - Do I have any power to change things?
If you’ve been reading these Blogs for a while or have looked at any of my books or the website you probably know by now that I do believe that the World is an infinitely supportive place and that I do have power to change my reality by changing my beliefs and my intentions.
I like this equation to describe life:-
Belief + Intention = Creation
I like to think as well that ‘I believe therefore I am’.
Within all of this though, what I have realised is that there is an underlying current of thoughts, feelings and beliefs that we are not always consciously aware of. We THINK we are in control but with a bit of analysis we find that our conscious mind is only a very small part of our total selves.
In addition to our conscious mind believing and creating our reality. Our sub-conscious mind and unconscious mind is doing the same. Hence the reason why we sometimes create repetitive patterns in our lives.
There are some lessons that we just can’t avoid. Some truths that we just can’t hide from. Some experiences that we just must have in this lifetime. Maybe we should call this fate? Or pre-destiny?
The point is that sometimes these things happen to us whether we like it or not. Whether we consciously intend them or not.
The beauty of life though – the richness of life – is that it is uncontrollable and unpredictable. So that means we get unexpected and unpredictable GOOD things happen to us as well (read ‘The Magic Box’ for more on this).
Recognising the benefit of stepping away from the delusion that we are in control creates space for magical things to occur.
The Self Mastery Program is aimed at proving the tools and techniques that slowly allow you to access a freer way of living. One that releases you from fears, anxieties and doubts and allows you to get to a place where you can look back and say ‘Yes, I engaged with life to the fullest whether it was good times or bad times I made the most of them always living in the moment, never living for tomorrow.’
The aim of this Blog is to provide ideas, tools and techniques that will allow you to change your beliefs and hence change the world.
So – practical application time.
Are you up for a challenge?
The challenge, should you choose to accept it is to stop complaining for one month.
Yes, that’s right – NO COMPLAINING – about anything.
So, if someone cuts you off on the freeway whilst driving to work – NO COMPLAINING. If you burn your toast in the morning – NO COMPLAINING. If your wife/husband/partner/lover forgets YOUR birthday – yep you guessed it – NO COMPLAINING.
No – ‘Oh poor me why is this happening to me?’
No – ‘What’s wrong with you why did you do that to me?’
Not even – ‘I’m having a BAD day’
NO COMPLAINING – NADA – ZIP – NOTHING
WHY? I hear you scream…
Ok, good question.
The word ‘Complain’ comes from the Latin word ‘Plangere’ – to strike or beat. It’s added to the intensive prefix ‘com’ – with. It’s meaning developed metaphorical ‘To beat one’s chest’ – or ‘com-plangere’ – ‘with a beating’.
Ha ha – are you laughing yet?
Complain – to beat one’s self up!!!
‘Oh poor me!’ indeed.
So would it be too obtuse of me to suggest that complaining is actually beating ourselves up?
If so, I don’t know about you but I’m over it and I really want to expunge it from my life.
But just a little but more digging first.
Where does it come from? For what purpose would we learn to beat ourselves up?
Think for a moment about how you feel when you are complaining – I mean really whining to someone…
Try doing it whilst beating yourself on the chest for great effect.
‘You’ll never believe what happened to me today! On the way to work I was minding my own business when this rude arrogant person just about ran me off the road. I tooted him with my horn but he just turned around and gave me the bird (one fingered salute – a rude gesture for those of you not familiar with western sensibilities…) Can you believe it? Then I pull into the car park at work and someone had parked in my spot! I had to park three levels down and then carry all of the things for my presentation up the stairs. And do you think anyone would help me? No! Of course not! People just looked at me struggling and then looked away. The nerve of some people! How dare they! Then I walk in the door only to find that the meeting has been shifted to another meeting room on a different floor so I have to pick all my things up again and go traipsing about until I find it. Finally, I find it and walk in only to find the meeting has already started. My boss just looked at me and shook his head. Why do things like that always happen to me?’
‘I am a victim. I have no power to change or influence my reality. All I can do is complain about what I am getting in the hope that someone, somewhere will hear me and release me from this hell. More than that I am addicted to the chemicals released in my brain when I complain and I really need you to say to me ‘You poor thing. How could they do such things to you? How could they be so mean to you?’ and maybe even promise that in some dark alley on a cold night you might step out from the shadows and bop them one just to teach them a lesson. Thereby giving me some much needed attention but at the same time trapping me into a victim mentality.’
And the origin?
Cast your mind back to being a toddler. Could you talk? No. So how did you get attention? You screamed. And who rescued you? Mummy or Daddy. And how did you feel then?
Complaining has its roots in the powerlessness of the infant human form. As babies we can’t walk, talk, feed ourselves or sustain ourselves in any way at all. Left to our own devices we’d be dead pretty quickly.
Beating our chests and complaining back then was a pretty good strategy.
Carried over into our adult years it becomes a burden.
So – are you a victim or a warrior?
A victim believes they have no power and can only make lots of noise and hope someone else will rescue them. They are a passenger on the journey of life.
A warrior believes they can influence the world. They see every obstacle as a challenge to overcome. They know that the world is a mystery that they cannot hope to comprehend but they keep trying anyway. They trust that what they are getting right now is right for them right now. They know that all is ALWAYS prefect regardless of how shitty things might seem right now.
So – try the challenge. Try not to complain for 30 days. Note what you complain about. Who you complain to and what you really get from it. Then delete it from your life and choose to step up and take responsibility instead.
Then see how life changes.